Finding The Humor In Life|A Place for Laughs|Poetry|Humorous Stories…

A bank robber was nicknamed the “Bucket List Bandit” after allegedly telling a Utah bank teller he had just four months to live. He was responsible for a string of heists spanning 10 states.

It was later determined that he didn’t have cancer or any other terminal illness.

“The impetus for the crimes was greed, not grief,” U.S. District Judge Sean McLaughlin told Michael Eugene Brewster, 54, formerly of Pensacola, Florida.

He was sentenced in Erie, Pennsylvania, located 120 miles north of Pittsburgh where his nationwide robbery string ended Sept. 10, 2012. It began June 21, 2012 in Arvada, Colo.

Brewster’s sentence works out to a year for each of the 11 bank heists he committed.

He was arrested three days after the Erie robbery when he ran a stop sign in Roland, Oklahoma.

Federal prosecutors brought him back to Erie and easily linked him to the other robberies because he was seen wearing the same pale blue polo shirt glasses and brushed back hair in surveillance videos.

According to court documents, Brewster stole a total of $33,858 and sometimes threatened tellers with violence and claimed to have a gun. Nobody was injured in the robberies.

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Geez, with all the money he stole you’d think he’d at least buy a new shirt.


A bank robber said he ill,

He wanted the cash in the till,

The teller complied

Not knowing he lied,

He ran out with a large wad of bills.

He held up a number of banks,

It gave the fed lots of angst,

He ran through a stop

And got caught by a cop,

The banks owe the cop lots of thanks.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh

All rights reserved.

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