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Casino

Casinos Getting People To Play Longer By Telling Them Rest Of Civilization Destroyed

LAS VEGAS—

Calling the practice a proven method for keeping players engaged, several Nevada casinos confirmed this week they often tell patrons that the rest of civilization has been obliterated in a worldwide catastrophic event and that the gambling facilities contain the last vestiges of humanity left on earth.

“Whenever our security cameras spot someone empty their last cup of quarters or walk away from a gaming table, we send an employee over to inform them that society as we know it no longer exists and that the world beyond our lobby is an uninhabitable wasteland,” Luxor general manager Paul Milton said, adding that they typically soften the blow by offering customers a complimentary drink or free tickets to see Criss Angel.

“It’s surprising how quickly most people will return to the casino floor once they’ve been told that everyone they’ve ever cared about has been vaporized in an inescapable cataclysm and that our walls are their only shield against deadly radiation.
In fact, for the slots players, you can barely get two words out about humankind’s downfall before they’ve turned around and started hurrying back to the machines.”
For less compliant patrons, Milton added that the casino will typically throw in a free night in its hotel while they decide if they want to stay and gamble or venture out and take their chances with The Horde.

Found @ http://www.theonion.com/articles/casinos-getting-people-to-play-longer-by-telling-t,35848/

Hmmm…

The casinos want people to stay,
And continue to gamble and play,
An air of concern is displayed,
Gambling should not be delayed.

The world is full of radiation,
It covers every nation,
In very large gradations,
Above all expectations.

The gamblers quickly comply,
Cause they do not want to die,
Escape? They don’t even try,
They just believe the big lie.

They go on spending their cash,
Even the cash from their stash,
Not one tries to dash,
It’s one big gambling bash.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved

Comments on: "Casinos Cultivate Catastrophe" (2)

  1. True, but they number in the thousands. It’s an addiction. Go figure.

  2. Well, they have to be fools to enter and gamble in a casino – in the first place.

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