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Study Finds Swans Only Other Animals Who Mate For Few Years, Get Scared, End Things, Then Regret It

 

ATHENS, GA—

Revealing how closely the waterfowl’s social behavior resembles that of humans, a study released Thursday by the University of Georgia has found that swans are the only other members of the animal kingdom that mate for a few years, get scared, decide to end things, and are later filled with immense regret.

“Although most animals either procreate freely or select a single partner with which to mate for life, we observed that swans, like humans, get freaked out about their relationship after an extended period of time together, abruptly call things off, and then come to realize they made a huge mistake,” avian biologist Michael Brooks told reporters, noting that both humans and swans typically grow increasingly dissatisfied with their romantic partner following a particularly monotonous period of feeding and nesting before panicking and concluding that they’re just not ready to settle down.

“While a swan that separates from its partner will inevitably determine that this impulsive decision was foolish, by the time the bird comes to this realization, its former companion has already met someone new and is very, very happy.”

Researchers also noted that only humans and swans enter a painful spiral of regret over their lost relationship and then compulsively mate with several partners in a futile effort to recapture what they once had.

Found @   http://www.theonion.com/articles/study-finds-swans-only-other-animals-who-mate-for,38198/

Hmmm…

Swans not staying together?

They’re not mating forever?

One leaves the nest,

Perhaps due to stress,

Their relationship is severed.

 

A recent swan study has found,

They’re not ready to settle down,

They are dissatisfied,

With what they have tired,

Do they leave not making a sound?

 

Later the swans have regrets,

Does that also apply to Egrets?

When they depart,

Does it break their hearts?

Is it something they cannot forget?

 

Or, is this study a fake?

If so, please give me a break,

In so many words,

We’re not like those birds,

We don’t swim and live in a lake.

 

It’s true couples do split,

When their life styles don’t fit,

But that’s not to say,

It is the swan’s way,

That’s something you’ll have to admit.

 

© 2015 Ronald J. Yarosh

All rights reserved

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