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Archive for the ‘Limericks’ Category

Are they Siri-ous?

IBM, also known as Big Blue, will not let its employees talk to Apple’s “Siri” application on their 4S IPhones while at work.

The company is concerned about voice commands which are given to Siri. They think the commands may be  saved in the Siri/Apple system. IBM thinks their employees will unwittingly divulge IBM corporate secrets to Apple.

I think IBM should take a bite out of Apple, like Adam and Eve did in the Garden of Eden. (I know, it was a different kind of apple. Just go with this.)

Wait a minute. If IBM took a bite out of Apple, Big Blue would be thrown out of Computer Heaven. Then they would have to spend the rest of their days facing problems, law suits, falling stock prices, and lost profits.

But those things have already happened to Big Blue. Is there something else we don’t know about IBM?


Now people at work can’t use Siri,

It’s making the workers quite weary,

They work for Big Blue,

They’ve always been true,

But their bosses are making them teary.

A Hopper, skip and a jump.

Dish Network has been sued by Fox, CBS, and NBC over its Hopper DVR. The TIVO like device automatically skips over ads, cutting into broadcasters’ revenue.

God forbid we should miss an advert on TV.

Oh, where did I put that box of tissues? I’m going to ruin the new wood flooring with my copious tears for the networks.

I haven’t felt this bad since my last colonoscopy prep.


Dish has been sued for its Hopper,

It is a real ad stopper;

It skips over ads,

For me that’s not bad,

I won’t have to watch that floor mopper.


It’s not just for the birds.

Now you can tour Angry Birds Land. It’s an amusement park in Finland. Like most amusement parks, it has restaurants (where you can pig out), games, rides, and Angry Birds related toys. You can even have a fling.

And, it’s okay to give someone the “bird” without ruffling anyone’s feathers.

Way to go Finland.

BTW remember this:  Just watch out where you step. You never know where one of those nasty pigs have pooped.


Angry Birds are now living in Finland,

In a park somewhere on the mainland,

The place is quite big,

It has many pigs,

Souvenirs are in really high demand.

PC Protection Pitiful

According to security firm, McAfee, nearly 20 percent of Windows PCs in the U.S. alone aren’t running any anti-virus software on their machines.

Sixty three percent of those computers have no security software at all.  That’s risky business!


There are folks who have no protection,

It’s sure to give them infections;

The percentage is high,

Though it’s easy to buy,

They’ll get hit without any detection.

The U.N. wants to control the web?

Last December, the U.N. proposed regulation of the Internet. Several countries, seem to be open to U.N. regulation. The U.S. doesn’t agree.

If you ask me, this is another money grab . Besides that, the U.N. can’t even control itself!


The U.N. wants control of our internet?

An idea we hope it will soon forget.

We don’t need control,

But that is its goal,

If it gets it, it’s something we’ll all regret.

Wicked Work Worries Wikipedia

A Mason University Professor who teaches a course called, “Lying About the Past” apparently got his students to post fictitious articles on Wikipedia since 2008. They recently got caught in their scheme.


There is an old Prof. who was lying,

What he wrote, the public was buying;

It was lying he taught,

But now he’s been caught,

Lying’s something he won’t soon be trying.

We’re gonna need a bigger net!

Note: This will be on the next test.

A recent study revealed that Internet traffic could reach one trillion gigabytes in four years. That’s a “zetabyte”.

 It is estimated that 18.9 billion devices could be connected by then.

Hey, here’s an idea. Why not be a part of it?


Soon the net will serve up a zetabyte,

That’s a number that’s really outta sight;

It’s one trillion gigs,

With angry birds and pigs,

It’s amazing it gets things mostly right.

Big Brother Strikes Again!

The US Congress has introduced a bill which will require black boxes in vehicles. If it passes all vehicles made in the U.S. will have the recorders installed. The government will be able to see where we go, and how we drive our vehicles.

Talk about an invasion of privacy.


U.S. cars may all get a black box,

The government will make the box talk;

It will tell where we’ve been,

Again and again,

An intrusion worse than the Small Pox.

Dragon Fires UP for Space Duty

The International Space Station has docked with the SpaceX Dragon. It’s the first commercial spacecraft to dock with the ISS. The craft is designed to bring supplies to the Station. Dragon is a free-flying, reusable spacecraft being developed by SpaceX under NASA’s Commercial Orbital Transportation Services (COTS).


The ISS docked with the Dragon,

It’s a delivery wagon;

It brings up supplies,

For the girls and the guys,

They might even get a nice flagon.

Waxing my USB?

How about this…

There’s a USB drive with an new twist on a hot, old idea. The stick can be sealed with an emblem made of wax. It verifies the data has not been opened by anyone since being sealed.

Who knows, maybe you will be able to make crayons with the seals afterwards. Imagine if the wax came in various scents? Maybe even flavored, for the wax chewers out there. You know who you are.

Hmmm… Should I wax poetic?

My flash drive now has a wax seal,

To insure what’s inside’s really real;

It’s easy to use,

No bolts or no screws,

For me it has lots of appeal.

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