I saw this video, which I thought was very nice, but not necessarily humorous.
The people involved look surprised.
You may want to have a towel handy.
I hope you enjoy it…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CyN9YNW3sKc&feature=youtu.be
I thought this video was pretty funny.
You may have already seen it.
If not, enjoy…
http://mom.me/in-the-loop/26414-orangutan-rofls-magic-trick/
Cat That Was Accidentally Sold With Mattress Gets Back Home
PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — Camo is hiding no longer.
The Oregon cat accidentally sold with a mattress set is home after 10 days on his own.
Roy Dufek wrote in a statement that his girlfriend, Hayley Crews, caught Camo in a trap Saturday night after he was reportedly seen near the Hillsboro Airport west of Portland. The trap was baited with sardines in oil and familiar scented clothing.
People across the Portland area and beyond had been on the lookout for Camo after his unusual disappearance got national attention.
Dufek sold his girlfriend’s mattress set Dec. 17 without realizing the cat was likely in a favorite hiding spot: the box spring.
Unable to find Camo at the mattress buyer’s home, Dufek took to social media for help tracking down the 5-year-old cat that likely scurried out of the box spring when the buyer, who lives near the airport, took it off the car roof.
Dufek wrote that Camo was 2 pounds lighter after 10 days outside, and had a cut lip, broken nails and a bleeding paw. On Sunday, Camo was examined by a veterinarian and given a bath by Crews.
“We can’t even imagine what he’s been through in a week and (a) half running wild near the countryside, especially in this weather,” Dufek wrote.
The couple thanked everyone for their help, saying it’s great to know friends and strangers had their back in time of need.
“We can’t ever repay or say thank you enough to all the people that spent their cherished holiday time, and resources to help us bring Camo home,” Dufek wrote Sunday. “It was quite emotional last night, we’re in shock of this whole experience, and have been holding him tight!”
Found @ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/29/cat-sold-mattress_n_6392298.html?utm_hp_ref=weird-news
Hmmm…
A cat was lost in a bed,
At least that’s what has been said,
A bed set was sold,
With the five year old,
Camo immediately fled.
He was out ten days on his own,
Hungry and lost all alone,
He made it all right,
Through days and at night,
In places that weren’t well known.
They caught him with sardines as bait,
They didn’t have too long to wait,
He entered the trap,
It closed with a snap,
The cat looked like he lost some weight.
Camo was checked out by a Vet.,
That is as good as it gets,
Then he went home,
No more will he roam,
That wonderful special cat pet.
© 2014 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
Hi there, friends.
Once again we present, for your dining and dancing pleasure, Your HORROR-Scope for the upcoming week.
This week’s charts indicate events and encounters ranging from squirrels, to monkey polish.
Where do you buy monkey polish?
We don’t know. Maybe you do.
I hope you are ready for it, (the HORROR-Scope not the polish).
Enjoy…
Aries… Jupiter is rising now to new heights in the solar system. This foretells bad news. In the future, you will strain yourself while making baby food. You will spend weeks in therapy.
Taurus… Uranus is square with Taurus at this time. In the future, you will become rich and famous with your family of singing squirrels. However, they will seek political asylum in Cuba, and leave you.
Gemini … Saturn is descending at this time. This foretells a bad outcome. In the future, you will spend years developing an air freshener, which will be shunned. Next time don’t call it, “The Scent of Sewer”.
Cancer … Mars is in its fifth house having some bathroom tile replaced. In the future, you will fail miserably at a new venture. You will design and make a line of formal attire for squirrels in the wild, but the EPA and PITA will block your efforts when they discover you are using real fur.
Leo… Venus is square with Leo now and in conjunction with the sun. This is a bad sign for you. In the future, you will become wealthy when you develop a shampoo and hair conditioner made from peanuts. However, your factory will be overrun with chipmunks and squirrels. You will go bankrupt and out of business
Virgo… Pluto is in its seventh house waiting for the solar police after it discovered a break-in. In the future, you will attempt to sell life insurance to sewer rats. It won’t go well for you. You will quit that job and seek employment as a nematode therapist.
Libra… The Earth is in conjunction with Libra now. This could be bad for you. In the future the police will stop your vehicle. They will search it and find what they believe is a stolen potholder, or some illegal pot. Either way the heat will be on. We hope you can deal with it.
Scorpio…The Sun is in opposition to Scorpio at this time. That foretells good news and bad news for you. In the future, you will make a fortune developing and selling monkey polish to organ grinders. But, you will lose all your money in lawsuits after several monkeys drink the fluid and dance themselves to death while listening to Dennis Miller on the radio.
Sagittarius…The Moon is trine with Sagittarius at this time. This foretells a bad business decision. In the future, you will try to make money knitting air tanks for SCUBA divers. However the wool will shrink causing a drop in air pressure. Your business will then go under.
Capricorn…Mercury is in its third house having a new phone system installed. In the not too distant future, you will jump at the chance to own a piece of history. An Egyptian will sell you a tomb in an attempt to get you involved in a pyramid scheme. You will lose a lot of money.
Aquarius …Mars is on the cusp of Aquarius now. That’s not good for you. In the future, you will develop a cereal called, Granny’s Granulated Grits. Unfortunately, you will go bankrupt when the FDA discovers that it’s made from number 8 sandpaper.
Pisces… Uranus is trine with Pisces now. That’s good and bad. In the future, you will gain fame and fortune when you develop the skill of juggling live squirrels. However, an animal rights group will sue you. That will cost you a lot of money ending your act.
And…remember what Weird Al says about astrology in his song, “Your Horoscope For Today”:
“Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that the relative position of the planets and the stars could have a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies to only you, but let me give you my assurance that these forecasts and predictions are all based on solid, scientific, documented evidence, so you would have to be some kind of moron not to realize that every single one of them is absolutely true.”
© 2014 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
TORRANCE, Calif. (AP) —
A pet parrot that spoke with a British accent when it disappeared from its home four years ago has been reunited with its owner — and the bird now speaks Spanish.
The Daily Breeze reported Sunday (http://bit.ly/1qU5dU3) the reunion was brought about by a Southern California veterinarian who mistook the African gray parrot for her own missing bird.
Teresa Micco tracked Nigel’s microchip to Darren Chick, a Brit who lives in Torrance.
Little is known about Nigel’s whereabouts the past four years, but Chick says the bird’s British accent is gone and it now speaks Spanish.
It’s the fifth parrot reunion facilitated by Micco, who has been running ads for her own missing bird for nine months.
Hmmm…
A parrot had suddenly vanished,
When it returned it could speak Spanish,
Missing four years,
That brought lots of tears,
Did it return cause it was famished?
The bird is an African Gray,
The pet suddenly went astray.
The owners were sad,
But now they are glad,
Let’s hope Nigel’s now home to stay.
© 2014 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
England –
Flood victim rescues goldfish found swimming down street.
Dave Pope rescued three goldfish with a teapot after seeing a “splash of orange” as he waded down a street in flood-hit Egham, Surrey.
After a week covering the misery and devastation of the flooding in southern England, this truly warmed my heart.
Dave Pope’s neighborhood is currently under so much water that there are goldfish swimming down the street. He’s probably got bigger things to worry about than their welfare.
But did he leave them to be drained away along with the rest of the deluge? Of course he didn’t. He grabbed the nearest teapot and whisked them to safety.
Hmmm…
A man did rescue three fish,
Saving them was his true wish,
Away from the drain,
Full of new rain,
They won’t be anyone’s dish.
Two of them are colored gold,
As the man’s story is told,
The other is white,
In the daylight,
He plucked them out of the cold.
A tea pot was then their new home,
Down ditches they wouldn’t then roam,
He saved all three lives,
The fishes survived,
Their fate in a sewer’s rushing foam.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.
Doga: how yoga can be good for dogs too.
A man tries to relax his excitable Chihuahua by teaching it yoga – and it copies him as he performs the poses
Many dog owners enjoy exercising with their pet – whether that is going for a walk, a run or riding a bike alongside their dog.
However, Nic Bello is looking to do something a little bit more relaxing and has been teaching his dog Pancho to do yoga.
Apparently this is a real thing – called “Doga”. As Chihuahuas are notoriously yappy and excitable dogs, I hope that all that stretching and breathing can help the little creature relax.
The pair have now released a series of dog yoga videos together, with this showing some more complex yoga moves:
See a video of it @:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/good-to-share/10591742/Doga-how-yoga-can-be-good-for-dogs-too.html
Hmmm…
A man gets his dog to do yoga,
He calls the routines his new “Doga”;
He stretches his body,
Without being haughty,
He’d really look good in a toga.
They do all the routines together,
In any and all kinds of weather;
They bend and they stretch,
It helps Poncho to fetch,
The dog is as light as a feather.
Chihuahuas are usually yappy,
Perhaps cause they’re always quite happy;
When you get such a pet,
It’s excitement you get,
It’s true; I’m not just being sappy.
They’re making a new video,
Doga’s the name of the show;
It’s something to buy,
For your dog to try,
It might help; you never know.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.
Tunbridge Wells Ostrich: RSPCA warns not to approach dangerous bird.
The RSPCA is urging the public to stay away from an ostrich that caused traffic chaos in Tunbridge Wells on Tuesday in case it “breaks someone’s leg” as it admits the bird may never be caught.
The charity also warned another escaped bird is on the loose less than 40 miles away in West Sussex after evading capture for almost two months.
The ostrich in Kent was spotted running beside cars at more than 40mph, causing motorists to slam on the breaks and making traffic slow to a crawl around the villages of Rusthall and Speldhurst between 8.30 and 9am.
The RSPCA said it was “not hopeful” of catching the ostrich, which is able to run up to 60mph and has a powerful kick that can kill a human.
It also warned that although the birds are not aggressive animals, they had the power to “break someone’s leg” if approached.
Written by By Alice Philipson
Found @:
Hmmm…
An ostrich is running about,
It never should have gotten out;
It’s been seen on the speedway,
Running fast every which way,
If seen, give a loud warning shout.
Authorities say to keep clear,
If it kicks you, you will shed a tear;
Just call in your sighting,
I’m sure it’s exciting,
More so than seeing a deer.
It can be a dangerous one,
Get close and it won’t be much fun;
It has a big kick,
Breaks your leg like a stick,
It’s best when you see it to run.
It’s causing a big traffic jam,
And many a car break to slam;
It’s been on the run,
For months, say some,
The big bird is now on the lamb.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.
Dog rescued from icy waters in Massachusetts
Two Massachusetts firefighters have made the holiday week brighter by their heroism in the face of the icy Charles River
When a Massachusetts fire department took a 911 call from a frantic dog owner, officers went into action to rescue Crosby.
The five year old Golden Retriever, had run out onto the ice and suddenly found herself deep in the freezing water about 50 yards off shore.
Two firefighters suited up in cold water survival gear and inched their way out onto the ice until they broke through to reach Crosby.
Firefighter Paul Papazian was able to rescue Crosby and guide her back to shore.
Once on shore Crosby was checked out and swiftly walked to a waiting, warm squad car and a dry towel.
She was a little cold and shaken, but seemed to survive the ordeal as best as could be expected.
Shortly thereafter, Crosby was re-united with her owners.
Courtesy: Wellesley Police Department
Found@:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/10537023/Dog-rescued-from-icy-waters-in-Massachusetts.html
You can watch a video of the rescue with the above link.
Hmmm…
Someone called 911.
Their dog was not having fun;
She fell into cold water,
Wishing it were much hotter,
Could something heroic be done?
They sent in a great rescue team,
While the owner probably screamed;
They went into the river,
While Crosby did shiver,
To onlookers it looked like a dream.
Onto the shore they arrived,
Crosby was still quite alive;
Wrapped up real tight,
Shivering from fright,
They’re happy that she did survive.
A lesson is here for us all,
Keep dogs leashed so they cannot fall,
Thru cold winter ice,
That wouldn’t be nice,
It’s something that would make us bawl.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.
Humorous Interludes by Ron Yarosh 
Spider Stash Surprising
Britain…
Family forced to flee home after deadly spiders found in bananas.
Father Jamie Roberts, 31, found hundreds of potentially deadly spiders in a bunch of bananas bought at the local shop.
A family was forced to flee their home and have it fumigated after hundreds of potentially deadly spiders were found in a bunch of bananas bought at the local shop.
Jamie Roberts, 31, spotted white patches of what he thought was mould covering the fruit. However, on closer inspection, he saw tiny legs and realised the bananas were hiding a nest of spiders.
He soon discovered the creatures had spread to other parts of his home.
Mr Roberts, a civil servant, said: "I knew something was wrong because then I noticed the white patches were all over the window sill and the curtains and I could see tiny legs and realised they were spiders.”
"At that point, I wasn't too concerned because I thought they looked dead. I was freaked out but I started to sweep the patches into the bin but then they all started moving.”
"It was like something out of a horror film because suddenly the window sill was moving with hundreds of these spiders."
The family called pest control and was told to immediately leave the house while it was fumigated.
Mr Roberts, his wife Crystal, 30, and their two children Georgina, seven, and five-year-old son Joshua, left their home in Hednesford, Staffordshire, on February 24.
The spiders have not been officially identified but the
family believe they could have been the world's most poisonous spider, the Brazilian wandering spider.
Guinness World Records lists the species as the most toxic spider on earth and its venom is said to be 30 times more powerful than that of a rattlesnake.
Humans bitten by one can suffer an irregular heartbeat, high blood pressure, vomiting and eventual death.
Mrs Roberts, who works for HMRC, bought the pack of bananas from the OneStop store near their home.
A OneStop Stores spokesman said an investigation was under way, adding it arranged for the family to stay in a hotel while the fumigation took place.
Found @ http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/10689098/Family-forced-to-flee-home-after-deadly-spiders-found-in-bananas.html
Hmmm…
They found some spiders in fruit,
Those critters sure weren't cute,
They wanted the spiders to scoot.
Cause in England they couldn't shoot,
First they thought it was mold,
Within the bananas folds,
They thought the fruit was too old,
But then why was it sold?
They said the spiders were awful,
And may even be harmful,
They knew they had to be careful,
So they were really prayerful.
They called in some fumigators,
Who are real spider haters,
The things will be cleaned up later,
And sent back to the equator.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
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