Sweat Seeker Sounds Silly
Warm Weather Finally Allows Man To Get Outside, Explore New Ways To Sweat
CHICAGO—
With the long winter over and summer weather finally arriving, local man Bill Klocek told reporters Thursday that he was glad to finally get out of the house, walk around a bit, and discover entirely new ways to sweat.
“This time of year, there are so many street fairs, farmers markets, and music festivals that offer great opportunities to just drench myself in my own sweat,” said Klocek, who added that he especially looks forward to perspiring heavily at restaurants with outdoor seating, on road trips, at baseball games, and at his parents’ cabin in Lake Geneva, WI.
“There’s really no excuse for avoiding it. Practically all you have to do is step out your front door and you can sweat completely through your shirt. My friend is having a party on his roof deck tonight, so I’m thinking about heading over and feeling sweat drip down my face and back at his place a little later.”
In addition to getting sweaty, Klocek stated that he also plans to set aside a little time this summer to explore entirely new ways to get sunburnt and thirsty.
Found @: http://www.theonion.com/articles/warm-weather-finally-allows-man-to-get-outside-exp,36265/And
Hmmm…
A man wants to make himself sweat,
Imagine the looks he will get,
When he walks in the streets drenching wet.
It’s something I wouldn’t forget.
He’s looking for places to go,
Where his sweaty body will show,
When is sweat glands begin to flow,
Making his foul odor grow.
He want his sweat on his face,
Though it may be a disgrace,
He’ll show up at any hot place,
To sweat he’ll pick up the pace.
There’s something else that he yearns,
He also wants a sun burn,
He’ll follow the sun and he’ll turn,
For redness that he’ll surely earn.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
Humorous Interludes by Ron Yarosh 
Cautious Cultural Contact
Trailblazing Colleague Makes Historic Contact With People Who Work On Other Floor
PITTSBURGH—
In an unprecedented encounter with a culture heretofore shrouded in mystery, Northco Logistics customer service specialist Ryan Barlow reportedly established historic contact Wednesday with the people who work on his office complex’s fourth floor.
“I met this guy Kevin who said they’d been having the same problems with the air conditioner we’ve been having,” said the 28-year-old explorer in reference to the peaceful words of greeting he exchanged in the elevator with an inhabitant of QuestTech Learning Solutions, a meeting that to this point had been considered far too perilous to be undertaken.
“He also said they had some leftover food and cake from his coworker’s birthday and that we could stop by if we wanted. He seemed very friendly.”
Though admitting that no one had yet dared journey so far, the intrepid adventurer then regaled his colleagues with the legend of the remote and uncharted seventh floor, where there was rumored to exist a vast open layout and, according to lore, a ping-pong table
Found @ http://www.theonion.com/articles/trailblazing-colleague-makes-historic-contact-with,36311/
Hmmm…
He met someone from another floor,
Something not seen before,
It wasn’t much of a chore,
He did establish rapport.
He is a history maker,
This company risk taker,
It wasn’t a deal breaker,
But maybe a hand shaker.
The man offered Ryan some cake,
Perhaps while he’s on his break,
An offer he might just take,
There wouldn’t be too much at stake.
Will Ryan do it again?
Risking some personal pain,
For some sociological gain.
Will his friends think him insane?
There are legends of things in that place,
Like floors with vast open space,
Maybe work done at a slower pace,
It’d be nice if that was the case.
It was a major breakthrough,
Something some others may do,
On higher floors with a good view,
Perhaps they’ll meet someone like you.
© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved
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