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Cat Catastrophe Case Closed


CAT Lost

Cat That Was Accidentally Sold With Mattress Gets Back Home

PORTLAND, Ore. (AP) — Camo is hiding no longer.

The Oregon cat accidentally sold with a mattress set is home after 10 days on his own.

Roy Dufek wrote in a statement that his girlfriend, Hayley Crews, caught Camo in a trap Saturday night after he was reportedly seen near the Hillsboro Airport west of Portland. The trap was baited with sardines in oil and familiar scented clothing.

People across the Portland area and beyond had been on the lookout for Camo after his unusual disappearance got national attention.

Dufek sold his girlfriend’s mattress set Dec. 17 without realizing the cat was likely in a favorite hiding spot: the box spring.

Unable to find Camo at the mattress buyer’s home, Dufek took to social media for help tracking down the 5-year-old cat that likely scurried out of the box spring when the buyer, who lives near the airport, took it off the car roof.

Dufek wrote that Camo was 2 pounds lighter after 10 days outside, and had a cut lip, broken nails and a bleeding paw. On Sunday, Camo was examined by a veterinarian and given a bath by Crews.

“We can’t even imagine what he’s been through in a week and (a) half running wild near the countryside, especially in this weather,” Dufek wrote.

The couple thanked everyone for their help, saying it’s great to know friends and strangers had their back in time of need.

“We can’t ever repay or say thank you enough to all the people that spent their cherished holiday time, and resources to help us bring Camo home,” Dufek wrote Sunday. “It was quite emotional last night, we’re in shock of this whole experience, and have been holding him tight!”

Found @ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/12/29/cat-sold-mattress_n_6392298.html?utm_hp_ref=weird-news

Hmmm…

A cat was lost in a bed,

At least that’s what has been said,

A bed set was sold,

With the five year old,

Camo immediately fled.

 

He was out ten days on his own,

Hungry and lost all alone,

He made it all right,

Through days and at night,

In places that weren’t well known.

 

They caught him with sardines as bait,

They didn’t have too long to wait,

He entered the trap,

It closed with a snap,

The cat looked like he lost some weight.

 

Camo was checked out by a Vet.,

That is as good as it gets,

Then he went home,

No more will he roam,

That wonderful special cat pet. 

 

© 2014 Ronald J. Yarosh

All rights reserved

Category:

News, poetry, Uncategorized

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Spider Stash Surprising


BANANA_SPIDER2_2848268b family

Britain…

Family forced to flee home after deadly spiders found in bananas.

Father Jamie Roberts, 31, found hundreds of potentially deadly spiders in a bunch of bananas bought at the local shop.

A family was forced to flee their home and have it fumigated after hundreds of potentially deadly spiders were found in a bunch of bananas bought at the local shop.

Jamie Roberts, 31, spotted white patches of what he thought was mould covering the fruit. However, on closer inspection, he saw tiny legs and realised the bananas were hiding a nest of spiders.

He soon discovered the creatures had spread to other parts of his home.

Mr Roberts, a civil servant, said: "I knew something was wrong because then I noticed the white patches were all over the window sill and the curtains and I could see tiny legs and realised they were spiders.”

"At that point, I wasn't too concerned because I thought they looked dead. I was freaked out but I started to sweep the patches into the bin but then they all started moving.”

"It was like something out of a horror film because suddenly the window sill was moving with hundreds of these spiders."

The family called pest control and was told to immediately leave the house while it was fumigated.

Mr Roberts, his wife Crystal, 30, and their two children Georgina, seven, and five-year-old son Joshua, left their home in Hednesford, Staffordshire, on February 24.

The spiders have not been officially identified but the
family believe they could have been the world's most poisonous spider, the Brazilian wandering spider.

Guinness World Records lists the species as the most toxic spider on earth and its venom is said to be 30 times more powerful than that of a rattlesnake.

Humans bitten by one can suffer an irregular heartbeat, high blood pressure, vomiting and eventual death.

Mrs Roberts, who works for HMRC, bought the pack of bananas from the OneStop store near their home.

A OneStop Stores spokesman said an investigation was under way, adding it arranged for the family to stay in a hotel while the fumigation took place.

Found @ http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/10689098/Family-forced-to-flee-home-after-deadly-spiders-found-in-bananas.html

Hmmm…

They found some spiders in fruit,
Those critters sure weren't cute,
They wanted the spiders to scoot.
Cause in England they couldn't shoot,

First they thought it was mold,
Within the bananas folds,
They thought the fruit was too old,
But then why was it sold?

They said the spiders were awful,
And may even be harmful,
They knew they had to be careful,
So they were really prayerful.

They called in some fumigators,
Who are real spider haters,
The things will be cleaned up later,
And sent back to the equator.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved

Category:

News, poetry, Uncategorized

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Burglar Bludgeoned by Brave Babes


Burglar gets after homeowner, daughter beat him with rolling pin, pan.

ALMONDBURY, England,

Feb. 20 (UPI) –

A British man was sentenced to 32 months in prison for a burglary during which he was beaten with a rolling pin and a pan by the homeowner and her daughter.

Adrian Gilroy, 29, pleaded guilty to breaking into the Almondbury home of Vena Lewis, 68, the Mirror reported.

Lewis was watching TV with her daughter, Tracy Dick, Sunday when they heard a noise in an upstairs bedroom.

The intruder tried to flee, but Lewis and Dick, armed with a rolling pin and a spaghetti pan, would not let him.

Dick hit Gilroy on the head with the pan while Lewis hit him across his legs with a rolling pin. They then pinned him to the floor and waited for police to arrive.

Acting Detective Inspector Ian Thornes commended the women’s bravery.

“It was a very brave effort by the two women. Both occupants are fit and well after their ordeal,” Thornes said. “However, we would issue cautionary advice about tackling intruders. Anyone who suspects they have an intruder in their house should ring 999 immediately.”

After the sentencing, Dick said: “I don’t feel like a hero and my body doesn’t feel like a hero. I was acting on instinct to protect my mother.”

Hmmm…

Two women were certainly brave,
The outcome could have been grave,
They captured a thief,
He suffered some grief,
It’s nothing that he would have craved.

The women went into quick action,
To their ultimate satisfaction,
They used a rolling pin,
Across his bony shins,
Falling was the guy’s reaction.

They then pinned him to the hard floor,
Then he could not steal anymore,
He was held for the cops,
They pulled out all the stops,
He didn’t know what was in store.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.

Read more: http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2014/02/20/Burglar-gets-after-homeowner-daughter-beat-him-with-rolling-pin-pan/UPI-87821392924946/#ixzz2tueevG00

Category:

Humor, News, Poerty

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Day’s Decisions Determine Direction


VDay

Nation’s Girlfriends Admit Absolutely Everything Riding On Valentine’s Day

WASHINGTON—

Confirming that it’s “all come down to this,” the nation’s girlfriends admitted Thursday that, despite anything they may have said or implied in the past, absolutely everything hinges on the outcome of this Valentine’s Day.

Describing the evening as “the indisputable make-or-break moment of our relationships,” the girlfriends explained that if Valentine’s Day fails, in any way, to live up to their standards, or if at any point they sense that not enough effort went into the occasion, then things are as good as over.

“Look, I’m gonna cut the crap here: I’ve basically funneled all my hopes for the future into this one night in which my boyfriend must achieve perfection, or else we’re through,” Virginia Beach area girlfriend Jenna Boyce, 27, told reporters, noting that she will be able to tell immediately if her boyfriend cheaps out on the flowers he has bought her or throws his gift together at the very last minute. “I expect an amazing, thoughtful, nearly flawless experience, one that is simultaneously fun and romantic, and a night I will remember for the rest of my life. Anything short of that, and I walk.”

“I know I’ve stated in the past that I believe Valentine’s Day is dumb and that it’s a commercial holiday and that it doesn’t matter to me, but I was lying,” Boyce added, in total concurrence with every other girlfriend in the country. “That was total baloney. I, in fact, care more about this than anything, by far.”

The nation’s girlfriends admitted to reporters, and to anyone who cared to know, that nothing their boyfriends have ever done for them in the past, including any and all good deeds previously rendered, will matter in the slightest if they don’t make tomorrow a day to remember.

The assembled women then confirmed that they expect the following things tomorrow, and they “don’t care” if these expectations make them appear either old-fashioned, demanding, or unrealistic: flowers; repeated romantic gestures and signs of physical affection; compliments; assorted gifts of an emotionally resonant nature; a dinner that is sufficiently high-end yet also warm and intimate; two to three fond recollections of the relationship’s origins; an outfit and attention to personal dress on the part of the boyfriend that shows he cares; extended eye contact; highly engaged conversation; no spared details; no mistakes; no jokes that in any way undermine the seriousness and romantic gravity of the evening; no mention of money or cost; and a minimum of 25 utterances of the word “love.”

“And if you don’t like it, that is too bad, because this is the attitude I am walking into tomorrow with and there is nothing you or anyone else can do to alter or subdue that attitude,” said Seattle area girlfriend Sonia Moreno, 31, noting that Valentine’s Day will be the sole metric she will use to gauge her boyfriend’s worth and romantic commitment. “That’s the reality. It’s all come down to this. And so, come tomorrow, I suppose myself and every girlfriend in America will find out for sure if their relationship has a future or not.”

The nation’s girlfriends also confirmed that if their boyfriends are able to go all out and make tomorrow truly special, then there is no reason why they couldn’t make a similar effort on every other day of the year too.

Found@
http://www.theonion.com/articles/nations-girlfriends-admit-absolutely-everything-ri,35270/

Hmmm…

There are expectations this day,
And the girls have the final say,
They want dinner and wine,
And it better be fine,
Or it could be the end of foreplay.

Men must be especially nice,
Giving them sugar and spice,
Girls want some nice jewelry,
And not some tom foolery,
Perhaps a ring frozen in ice.

This is the night of decision,
Men must show love with precision,
They must make the right move,
To get her in the groove,
They must plan it with love’s perfect vision.

So men get yourselves in gear,
For it only comes once a year,
Be nice and romantic,
Do not be pedantic,
Go forward without any fear.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.

Category:

Humor, Lifestyles, News, Observations, Poerty, Uncategorized

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Boy Bemused By Bonbons


candy boy

Pudgy Doughboy With Rosy Red Cheeks Presses Nose Up Against Window Of Chocolate Shop

BOSTON—

His woolen mittens dangling from the ends of his sleeves and his mouth partially agape in breathless wonder, a pudgy doughboy with rosy red cheeks is currently pressing his round button nose up against the display window of a local chocolate shop, sources confirmed.

The astonished butterball, his cheeks aglow in the biting cold, is reportedly flattening his plump face right up against the shop window, occasionally wiping the fog from the steamed-up glass as he gazes longingly at the sugary confections contained within, his mind dancing with possibility, his eyes wide with wonder.

According to sources, the sight of a fresh tray of bonbons being carried ever so tantalizingly to a display table near the front of the store has caused the transfixed doughboy’s eyes to glaze over in an almost narcotic stupor of yearning and delight.

Reports have also confirmed that the intoxicating aromas of melted chocolate, sweet cream, and fresh puff pastry wafting out of the shop’s just opened door have merged in midair to form a veritable olfactory symphony in the roly-poly tot’s imagination, each delectable scent drawing the little piglet’s flushed cheeks closer still to the glass, an inaudible “Wow!” forming on his drool-glistened lips.

At press time, the doughboy’s impatient mother was grabbing him by his coat sleeve and rushing him hurriedly along down the street.

Found @:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/pudgy-doughboy-with-rosy-red-cheeks-presses-nose-u,34792/?ref=auto

Hmmm…
A young man just loves all sweets,
He likes to consume the treats;
He looks on and dreams,
Of sugary creams,
Like candies, and pastries to eat.

On the glass he presses his nose,
As his sweet anticipation grows;
The scent of it’s nice,
Like sugar and spice,
He’d devour them all I suppose.

The kid’s a bit over weight,
He walks with an overweight gait,
The sweets make him fat,
His stomach’s not flat,
But he thinks his shape is just great.

His dear mother pulls him away,
From his intoxicating gaze;
He can’t see the stuff,
His mother’s so rough,
He must wait for another day.

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh
All rights reserved.

Category:

Humor, Lifestyles, News

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GRUMPY GETS GLORIOUS GIG!


ST. LOUIS (AP) — It probably won’t affect her famous mood, but Grumpy Cat now has an endorsement deal.

The frown-faced Internet sensation, real name Tardar Sauce, is now the “spokescat” for a Friskies brand of cat food, Nestle Purina PetCare announced Tuesday. The St. Louis-based company didn’t release terms of the deal.

Photos of Grumpy Cat, her brown and white face in a constant scowl, have become a constant presence on Facebook and other social media, often accompanied by crabby messages such as “I don’t like days that end in Y” or “I’m listening, I just don’t care. She also is among the biggest stars of the peculiar trend of cat dominance on Web videos and postings.

Grumpy Cat’s own Facebook page has more than 1.3 million likes. The dour animal also has more than 111,000 Twitter followers.

In addition to the relationship with Nestle Purina, which featured Grumpy Cat in an online video game series in March, the 1 ½-year-old mixed-breed feline has a merchandise line and reportedly has a movie deal in the works.

“She’s very busy,” Friskies spokeswoman Julie Catron said. “The first thing she’ll do for us is receive the lifetime achievement award.”

Catron isn’t kidding. The feline will receive the award Oct. 15 in New York as Friskies honors the best cat videos of the year as chosen through an online vote.

Grumpy Cat is owned by Tabatha Bundesen, who lives in Phoenix.

Story found at:

http://xfinity.comcast.net/articles/news-odd/20130917/US-Grumpy-Cat-Endorsement/

Hmmm…

Grumpy will get an award,

Gosh, I’m really quite floored;

A cat with a “tude”,

Who looks really rude,

She also appears to be bored.

Her face has a constant scowl,

Like her life has run afoul;

She makes up great quotes,

So you should take notes,

The humor will make you howl.

The cat’s a star on Facebook,

Because of her serious look,

She’s big on the “Twitter”,

Though her face looks bitter,

Her fans are really quite hooked.

Now the cat has got a big deal,

That’s what Purina revealed;

She might get a movie,

Hey that would be groovy,

Who knew that she’d have such appeal?

© 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh

All rights reserved.

Category:

News

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Tubers Turning To Timely Transmissions


A new study revealed that more people are turning to YouTube to see “eyewitness accounts” of events in the news.

I guess nothing escapes the eyes of vigilant YouTubers.

Now anyone can be a News Anchor, (aka Talking Head).

Just get your camera or phone and start recording.

You never know what will go viral these days.

Hmmm…

More people use YouTube for news,

I guess they like different views,

They watch an event,

As soon as it’s sent,

Just watch, you have nothing to lose.

 © 2013 Ronald J. Yarosh

Category:

YouTube

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Google’s Graciously Giving Ten Grand


Good old Google is now giving up to $10,000. in business loans.

They are hoping to spur interest in their Google Ad business.

They will loan the money if a business subscribes to their ad service.

Hmmm…

Dear Google please give me a loan,

My cash is in the dead zone.

I really need money,

I’m strapped, it’s not funny.

Pay up and I’ll leave you alone.

Category:

Google

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Facebook? Heartbook? Spleenbook?


Facebook is now allowing users to sign up as organ donors in their timeline. I haven’t done it yet. I did sign up for the driver’s license organ donor program. I wonder if there would be a legal battle between the DMV and FB if I signed up with FB. I can see it now. “Body Snatchers Three…Parts is Parts.”

Hmmm.

There is an old man on my corner,

Who signed up to be a dead donor;

He’s giving his heart,

And other good parts,

Of which he is currently owner.

 

Category:

computers, Developments, Facebook, Humor, Laughs, Life, Lifestyles, Limericks, News, Observations, Organ Donors

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The New Asteroids Game


A company called Planetary Resources, Inc. wants to mine “Near Earth” asteroids for rare minerals. They will use Arkyd-100 space ships in the endeavor.

Here’s my take on that…

They’re going to mine out in space,

It’s a cold, dark terrible place,

They’re taking a chance,

They could lose their pants,

If they do they will also lose face.

Category:

Asteroids, Geology, Humor, Laughs, Limericks, Minerals, New Trends, News, Science, Space, Space Craft, Space ships, Technology

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